The power of inclusion
This week was a big week for NYC - almost 1 million children in the public school system went back to school, many of them for the first time in 18 months.
Although it has been exhausting logistically and I'm anxious from a covid perspective, I am so grateful for a start to the school year that feels good for both kids from a social and emotional perspective. I didn't know how it was going to be, especially for my 5th grader who has been remote for 18 months.
My 5th grader shared some small but really thoughtful things his teachers have done to help him feel welcomed and seen in the classroom. For example, he got a personalized laminated bookmark from his teachers naming some of the things they appreciate about him - how customized this was, I don't know, but it has his name, and it felt really special to him. It was so different to anything he felt last year, despite the best efforts of his teachers with regard to remote learning.
And this weekend, as I heard my 7th grader and some of his new friends geeking out about... I could not comprehend what, I thought wow, he has found his people at a school that is actively fostering inclusion.
I feel like I'm seeing the power of inclusion - where you feel a sense of belonging and acceptance for who you are and not because you are working hard to fit in - play out in front of my eyes in real time with my own kids.
I see how much difference just a little bit of psychological safety can make. We see it in our client organizations too.
Our deep deep socialization into systems of oppression can make it SO SO HARD though. So can our own traumas that tell us that when other people don't feel safe, we aren't safe either. The spiral of escalation can happen so quickly. It's much harder to start a spiral of de-escalation.
I think what I'm trying to say is that seeing my kids thrive even in the space of a few short days has reminded me that it's worth it.
It's worth managing our defenses and leaning into curiosity instead.
It's worth embracing difference and holding space for the multiple truths of different people's experiences.
It's worth "creating a circle and not a ladder" and making space for everyone.
And also... I am tired. So tired. Shout out to those of us who are holding space for so many people, with systems that fail us over and over. Shout out to those of us who are holding it together... and those of us who aren't. Shout out to our brave and beautiful kids who didn't deserve any of this and who are forging ahead and doing the best they can anyway.
I hope this year goes as safely and smoothly as possible.
Banner photo by Willian Justen de Vasconcellos on Unsplash
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