Inclusive leadership skills: processing emotions
A lot of people have been processing a lot of emotions over the past two weeks since the US election, whether publicly, privately, outwardly or inwardly, in large or small, direct or indirect ways… or not at all.
We’ve held group processing sessions for at least some segment of staff at all of our client organizations as well as 1:1 coaching and each conversation has been very different.
We don’t claim to have answers as we are ourselves processing, with a pretty wide range of ways of doing that even on our own team.
What I do know is that processing emotions is a critical inclusive leadership skill.
I mean, it’s a critical skill, period, leadership or otherwise - we are all human and we all have emotions, whether we like it or not.
But it’s a particularly important leadership skill (whether you’re in a formal or informal leadership role) because of the impact we have, as leaders, on others.
I’m not going to say that stuffing emotions is categorically unhealthy - there are times when it’s what we need to do to get through whatever is right in front of us.
However, when we don’t take the time to process emotions, they are likely to come out sideways in ways that are harmful to ourselves and others.
Processing our emotions helps us to self-regulate.
When we are aware of our emotions and can name them, as well as understand the underlying causes of our emotions, including past experiences and unmet needs, we can choose a more intentional and considered response, rather than being reactive or dumping our emotions on others.
It’s also important to be able to be empathetic to the emotions of others, and to hold space for the emotions of others without taking those emotions on as our own.
Yes, we are human, and sometimes we need to have an emotional tantrum or a good wallow… but it’s important to do so in ways that aren’t harmful to others.
What does this look like in practice?
Here are some past blog posts where we’ve talked about this:
What are you doing to process your emotions right now?
Banner photo by Alex Shuper for Unsplash+